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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Of love by Water

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 Posted: Mon Jul 2nd, 2007 11:58 pm
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timmy
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Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 1079
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Mana: 
sunset drops faraway
the earth sends sadness
singing his spousal voice
disappearing now eight years

years gaze in girl’s shallow smile
leads him to distance memory,
a lullaby of echoing petals,
a dim recollection dwells

dwells June love by water
shines on wet eyes’ rims
the solitude of a young day,
a single step, a solitary step

step softly another lonely sunset
follows yet another lonely sunset

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