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THE PLAYWRIGHTS' FORUM : stageplays-forum.com > The Art & Craft of Writing > Critique my Poem > Ten to One
Ten to One
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timmy
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Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 341
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
  Posted: Mon Jun 30th, 2008 01:13 am
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1.
the body,
a white
wine.
bubbles

what skin does

2.
neck,
all the mystery
of a border town

3.
swivel,
a kind of moral
tale, a sheet

face on
a broken pillow

4.
neck wrist waist

5.
fingers
patterns

hollows
corners

in the corner
two of us

6.
something respectable,
closed mouth

dust and raw

7.
eyes

closed

solace

8.
Knowing pyramids
were there

helps

9.
i am the wasp
in your navel

10.
snake eyes
are painted
on my back

only you can see
them

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