Be brutally honest - Critique my Poem - The Art & Craft of Writing

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Be brutally honest

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tool0204
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Posted: Tue Aug 12th, 2008 05:17 pm

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I just wrote this in the last 30 minutes. Heard that writing poems can be therapeutic, so I'm giving it a shot.

A mind shot
So tired and beat
Time to let go
Just hope you forgot

Do I over analyze and contemplate
Should I be confused
Looking for something to compensate
For this lack of being

Sounds like misery
Feels like complacency
Did I miss that boat or
Is it coming back for me

I hear the music
But my senses defy me
It’s time to use it
Could be my last chance

If it were a light switch
I’d hold it down til death
Thought I’d be ok
Just take a breath

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