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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Achmed & the Whimsical Carpet

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 Posted: Sat Sep 9th, 2006 01:50 am
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lostsocks
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Joined: Sun Jun 11th, 2006
Location: Cambridge, United Kingdom
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Mana: 
Largely wrote this by accident whilst playing with words... Lol I'm not even sure it makes sense (and that coming from me!)


Achmed & the Whimsical Carpet

There was a boy, a devilish rogue
Achmed with an A
By night he was a communist
A street rat by day

He got the princess pregnant
Done a great deal wrong
When the guards cried treason
He just burst into song

He stole bread from the bakers
And blew up all the trains
When driving down the motorway
He took up all the lanes!

He stopped your watch -
Ran over the cat -
Took the house next door -
He made them cancel Kilroy!
We could take this boy no more!

And so one fine Arabian night,
When the moon was full
We shot young Achmed out the sky,
Carpet, Hat and all.

The moral to our story
As the poor boy hits the floor
Is that men fear nothing more than dreams
And even dreams may go to war

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 Posted: Mon Sep 25th, 2006 06:18 am
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BrianRobertNeal
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Location: Bishop's Stortford, United Kingdom
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"Made them cancel Kilroy"-so he wasn't all bad then.

Thanks for your review,

 

Brian

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 Posted: Mon Sep 25th, 2006 02:27 pm
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lostsocks
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LOL I guess not - no worries

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