View single post by RTurco
 Posted: Wed Jan 30th, 2013 08:13 pm
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RTurco



Joined: Wed Nov 19th, 2008
Location: New Jersey USA
Posts: 256
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Mana: 
Thanks for the feedback grinderwriter!

This piece is actually not meant to be a comedy, aside from some amusing moments sprinkled here and there. It gets serious later on in the work, I promise. In reality, most of the piece is not set in Hell, but on Earth where it becomes a riveting family drama about a man's search of self that is complimented by his lessons on sin and living in the afterlife.

As for the monologues, I understand your qualms with telling not showing. I may cut that opening a little bit to reflect some confusion on Armand's part. As for the second one, I can have a letter pop up that notifies Armand that he's been expelled. Hmm... I'll see what I can do.

Thanks for the critique! Care to read more?