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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Transfering Patsy's poem "BUZZING BELFAST" to here

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Transfering Patsy's poem "BUZZING BELFAST" to here  Rating:  Rating
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 Posted: Thu Feb 26th, 2009 02:15 pm
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Potabasil
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For the Belle of Belfast City

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZT73FsWeWU

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 Posted: Tue Feb 17th, 2009 08:59 pm
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Potabasil
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Patsy

It was the kids skating not me. I can't even stand on the ice around here, I land up on my bum.  I have a fear of broken bones. but the skating was very pretty to look at like a painting from LS Lowry, the English artist

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wd4BwGbM_kg

Last edited on Tue Feb 17th, 2009 09:03 pm by Potabasil

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 Posted: Tue Feb 17th, 2009 08:50 pm
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patsy2
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You seem to be a busy mum
and having a ball at the same time
ice skating with the kids must be fun something i never did with mine
threw a couple of snow balls and slipped on ice.  Although we did manage to go
swimming and i nearly drowned now my kids are big boys but I'm not a granny yet
and there's no more fun

Cheers Patsy

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 11:42 pm
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About time Patsy.  I'm just in from a weekend of it. Today myself and the English went to Boston with the kids.  We went to CHEERS.............What a DIVE.  Never again.

Anyway apart from that it was all very nice.  The kids loved the Ice Skating on Frog Pond on the Boston Common.  And we took them on the underground which is called the "T" here.  Eoghan saw a mouse on the tracks.  A Boston Mouse.

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:40 pm
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patsy
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Hi I'm glad you liked my poem
but I don't think I wrote it when
I came home from Buzzing Belfast
actually I don't think I came home
HA HA
Cheers Patsy

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:34 pm
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patsy
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Hi edd
glad you like my poem
I've been there to and got the T-Shir
Cheers Patsy

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:26 pm
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patsy
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I would also love to share a martini with you
in media res
cheers patsy

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:24 pm
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patsy
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I eventually did leave the crown
Cheers Patsy

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:21 pm
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patsy
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I'm glad my poem made you feel young again I bet your not that old
Getting old is no fun I'm almost there my-self, Buzzing Belfast has caught
up with me I'm now what you would call Cinderella

Cheers Patsy


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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:16 pm
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patsy
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Thanks for the warm welcome
I glad my poem knocked the socks off YA
Saturday night fever was a great movie
and Saturday night in Belfast is even better
 Cheers Patsy

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 Posted: Mon Feb 16th, 2009 09:10 pm
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patsy
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Hi Potabasil

Thanks for the lovely words I'm glad I painted a happy picture for you
cheers Patsy

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 Posted: Sun Feb 15th, 2009 03:32 pm
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Potabasil
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Yer right why should she leave all that craic

Phone rang 10a.m.  and I'm in bed (It's Sunday) So my new friend around the corner is from England and her mother arrived in yesterday on the aeroplane.  So I'm meeting them down the pub.

I get up and tell my husband I'm going down the pub at noon and he laughs.  It's a beautiful sunny day and your going down the pub. 

Yes well Look at Patsy she went down the pub and came home and wrote a beautiful poem.

Let's see what I bring home.. See you all later

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 Posted: Sun Feb 15th, 2009 01:04 am
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in media res
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From the sound of the poem, why leave?

I'll drink my martini tonight in honor of patsy.

best,

in media res

Last edited on Sun Feb 15th, 2009 01:05 am by in media res

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 Posted: Sat Feb 14th, 2009 03:22 pm
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Potabasil
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Patsy never came back.  Do you think she is still in the Crown bar?

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 Posted: Fri Feb 13th, 2009 04:00 pm
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That's quite exciting stuff, Patsy.  I found myself caught up in the excitement of Saturday nights spilling into the wee hours causing me to feel the deja vu of the younger man long past.

~Edd

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 Posted: Fri Feb 13th, 2009 03:23 pm
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in media res
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Sort of a Belfast "Saturday Night Fever!" (The original article in New York Magazine on which the movie was based was fantastic.)

Also, shades of some rhythms of 'beat" poets from the '5O's.

I was tired at the end of it. Whew, what a swirl of an entire evening captured in a few lines. Felt I was there.

Thanks.

Welcome to the Forum.

Let's see more.

best,

in media res

Last edited on Fri Feb 13th, 2009 03:23 pm by in media res

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 Posted: Fri Feb 13th, 2009 01:45 pm
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Patsy

If I were an artist I would paint a beautiful painting from this poem.  You also made me homesick, thanks very much

Potabasil

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 Posted: Fri Feb 13th, 2009 12:02 am
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Edd
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Patsy,

Welcome to the forum.  The reason I moved your poem to here was because this is the section for Poetry.  The area where you posted was specific to general information to our members only.

Again, welcome.

~Edd

Thank you for welcoming me and this is all new to me.  I have written a poem for you to read and I hope you enjoy I also have written a play its a comedy play and it shows the type of person that I am and so do my poems I have a good personality and I can take on board any sort of criticisms with a pinch of salt thats how I learn and I love writing poems

Buzzing Belfast

Down town in the city
The night life is busy
Discos are dancing
And the pubs are crawling
Romance in the air
As the boy grabs the girl

The pubs are all packed
Withe the food and the craic
While the disco diva takes the floor
The chancer tries it on once more
The bar mans pumps runs out of beer
So drink up folks
The night drawing nearer

Round by the city hall
They're having a ball
Open air concert free admission for all
The rock bands are drolling
The metalers are banging
And the dancers let down their hair

In the Crown bar there's quite a stir
When they hear of the new law
No Smoking at all

Over in the Europa
Swanks join the Yanks
The bellboy speaks to confirm
Their names.

A student of Queens writes his own verse
Closes the rhyme in alphabetical words

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