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forgot i even wrote this  Rate Topic 
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 Posted: Wed Feb 25th, 2009 03:15 pm
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leon
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AUDITION

 

A SHORT MONOLOG

By Leon Kaye

c. 2007

 

Pretty, young, AMY, stands on an empty stage, play script in hand.

 

JEFF, director, sits in the audience.

 

JEFF:  Thank you very much, Miss Romeo.  Don’t call us, we’ll call you.

AMY:  But you won’t call, will you?

JEFF:  Just a nice way of saying, “next”.

AMY:  You don’t understand, theatre is in my blood.  When I was ten years old, I was playing at Lincoln Center, and I say this to everyone cause I want them to think I was on stage when I was just playing jump rope in the parking lot.  But I got the theatre bug in me and I had to be on stage.  I just had to.

 

So I auditioned for the part of Crowd Member #5 in my middle school production of Les Mis, and I got understudy…  And when I tried out for high school chorus, my teacher told me not only should I not be in the chorus, but I should be barred from singing in the shower. (starts to cry)

 

Once in high school, I tried out for Maria in West Side Story.  They said I could play the lead if someone lip-synched my vocals.  (blubbering)  I tried out for Juliet and lost out to my brother!

 

So I dropped out of school, cashed in my college bonds and bought a one way train ticket to New York… from New Jersey – but still.  I was determined.  I’ve been waitressing, driving cabs, selling heroin, all to make fast money so that I could one day fulfill my dream – to play a small role in any two bit, admission free, avante-garde, no frills, bare stage, badly written stage play I could find.  But everywhere it’s no.  No, no, no, no, no!  (falls to her knees)  I don’t think I can take any more.  This is it.  This is my last audition.  Either you cast me or my life is over!  (sobs uncontrollably)

 

JEFF:  (waits for her to regain control)  Miss Romeo?  (beat)  Ya ever think of auditioning for a soap?

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 Posted: Wed Feb 25th, 2009 06:50 pm
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seckermann
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Mana: 
Lol...

wow. I know that girl. We went to high school together...

:)  I really liked this...

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 Posted: Thu Feb 26th, 2009 02:41 pm
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Paddy
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Mana: 
Definately ended with a drum rift.

Leon.  Predictable to be telling all this to the director who just wants to move on...but wouldn't it be more interesting if she's working in the restaruant, telling the guy who just wants his freakin' coffee?

A thought.

Paddy

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 Posted: Thu Feb 26th, 2009 04:36 pm
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seckermann
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Mana: 
lol... that would be funny... The thought of some poor schmuck listening to this woman drone on and on when all he wants is his cuppa... nice...

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 Posted: Thu Feb 26th, 2009 04:52 pm
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leon
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Mana: 
paddy, that would work in your "on the street" theatre thing you do, wouldn't it?  have the girl basically accost the group that's walking around, begging them to be in the festival.

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 Posted: Thu Feb 26th, 2009 05:10 pm
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Paddy
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Mana: 
Yep.  You'd have to rework it...maybe she auditioned for it, and didn't get in.

 

Paddy

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 Posted: Fri Feb 27th, 2009 03:04 pm
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leon
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Mana: 
do you have a person that leads the group around?  that would be perfect, the young woman could walk up to her and say, "what happened?  why didn't you call me?"  then turn to one member of the group and say something like, "i was supposed to be the actress in (the last short play they saw) and i was waiting to hear back and no one called me."

then go into her little monolog...

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 Posted: Thu Mar 12th, 2009 11:42 am
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Paddy
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Mana: 
Yes, we always have a 'lead around' piece.  Sometimes, it's a play broken into scenes, or it's written specifically for the show.

 

Paddy

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