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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Without Warning

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timmy
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Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
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Father often used words
instead of fists; he shook
the air with his words

his words blew in like
falling rafters, splinters
were everywhere

What words we chose to bear
he gave without warning,
a camera flash was not
quicker

the emptiness, the ritual:
his words were always
the same, synonyms
were not needed until
his wind lost its tongue
and it was time to love

in media res
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timmy, timmy, timmy, timmy, timmy,

Half of me says quit teasing me with the beauty of your poems.

Every thought/phrase of this resonates.

You capture a guy like my guy/dad.

The other half says bathe/drown it all over me with the thunder of Niagara Falls.

You schmuck! I beg you, keep doing this to me!

best,

in media res

Last edited on Fri Mar 18th, 2011 02:33 am by in media res

timmy
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Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 1079
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Haven't had anyone call me a "schmuck" for a few years...feels good.

timmy



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