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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Maybe Freud was Right

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 Posted: Fri Nov 18th, 2011 01:41 pm
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timmy
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Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
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Mana: 
(id)

at ten, the bones
of a child’s life
were broken
by the tall, trusted man

his body hangs
by a thread;
he will walk
like a small
puppet ‘til death

(ego)

day in, day out
at a length no longer
than his penis,
the tall, trusted
man was driven
by the sweet voice
of neurosis, a conflict
not unlike the love
he must have felt

(super ego)

native
to myth

and a child,
doomed to age
a normal life
of remembering

*(for the victims of Jerry Sundusky)

Last edited on Fri Nov 18th, 2011 01:42 pm by timmy

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 Posted: Fri Dec 2nd, 2011 12:45 am
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lostsocks
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Mana: 
Beautiful idea for a layout, and a really haunting poem.

Thanks for posting this.

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 Posted: Sat Dec 3rd, 2011 02:00 am
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timmy
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Mana: 
Thanks for responding. Not sure I'm qualified to write this.

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 Posted: Sat Dec 3rd, 2011 09:59 am
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lostsocks
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Most psychiatrists aren't qualified to write poetry, I know which of the two I'd sooner leave out of the equation :D

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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Maybe Freud was Right Top




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