Love it. And I admire your poetry.
Seldom do I do this, but I speak with heart-felt certainty (which means absoutely nothing in the grand scheme!) I would suggest end it after...
"I saw only the symmetry."
Everything after that is superfluous.
We get it perfectly by then.
We understand the situation and the problem.
You even say yourself:
are not necessary."
Heed your own line!
They are not necessary!
Keep the good stuff coming. Thanks for posting.
Do you get the daily Writer's Almanac from Minnesota's NPR? I have been geting it daily for about two years now and turned a lot of people on to it. Great way to start the day...with a poem. Delivered daily to your e-mail box. Plus informative tidbits of literary history on this day.
Here is the address to sign up for you and others who may be interested:
in media res
Last edited on Sun Oct 1st, 2006 05:29 pm by in media res