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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > It's Time to be a Real Writer

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 Moderated by: Paddy, Edd  
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timmy
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Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 1078
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Mana: 
Your words look like tiny branches,
stripped and strewn about
by straight line winds,
taken from a cigar box of ideas:
a plastic Kmart shoehorn, stub pencils,
one cuff link, your college ID,
a few pink crushed Dixie cups,
Mercury dimes.

You look out the window, a mourning dove
cuts across a pale sky, the mate
nowhere in sight.

It's time to begin that obituary; you are determined
to make anyone understand.

Edd
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Joined: Sat Jun 10th, 2006
Location: Denver, Colorado USA
Posts: 1622
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Mana: 
Ahh, crap! And I was feeling young today. Thanks a bunch, guy! However, I would be remiss not to say, Powerful, Beautiful, Sad . . . .

timmy
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Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 1078
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Mana: 
You are young, Edd. Just look at you.

Thanks for the comments.

timmy



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