The Playwrights Forum Home 
 

SEARCH STAGEPLAYS.COM
THE WORLD'S LARGEST PLAY DATABASE

  STAGEPLAYS BOOKSHOP NEW CYBERPRESS PLAYS PLAYWRIGHTING BOOKS PUBLISH MY PLAY AFFILIATE PROGRAM THE THEATRE BANNER EXCHANGE  
The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Upon Learning the Next Clear Night is Tuesday

* STAGEPLAYS WANTS TO PUBLISH YOUR PLAY *
click here for details

 Moderated by: Paddy, Edd  
AuthorPost
timmy
Member
 

Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 1079
Status: 
Offline
Mana: 
You come to me out of January
snow and when I ask

for a touch, you tell me all the homes
in Minnesota have dandruff.

You laugh until my mouth shelters
yours against the fireplace.

In the deep evening of my fear, I tell you
my needs keep me grounded

until I turn to stroke the whiteness
from your hair,

promise to have you home
before dinner.

Edd
Moderator


Joined: Sat Jun 10th, 2006
Location: Denver, Colorado USA
Posts: 1622
Status: 
Offline
Mana: 
I didn't know what was going on at first, not that I need to and probably shouldn't, and then I was hit by thunder. I am so afraid of that finale, I think I would dive off one of the Rocky Mountain cliffs first. There is too much pain there. Just too much pain for this old man.
Love, Edd

RTurco
Member


Joined: Wed Nov 19th, 2008
Location: New Jersey USA
Posts: 260
Status: 
Offline
Mana: 
This is a masterful poem. It has such a haunting, undulating rhythm. Beautiful.

timmy
Member
 

Joined: Fri Jun 9th, 2006
Location: Oz, Minnesota USA
Posts: 1079
Status: 
Offline
Mana: 
Kind words from the two of you. Much appreciated.

timmy



UltraBB 1.17 Copyright © 2007-2011 Data 1 Systems
Page processed in 0.1449 seconds (20% database + 80% PHP). 26 queries executed.