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The Playwrights Forum > The Art & Craft of Writing > Poet's Corner : Critique my Poem > Day Seventy Two

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Day Seventy Two  Rate Topic 
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 Posted: Fri May 22nd, 2020 11:12 am
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Potabasil
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Whole house
falling down
around her

Cigarette ash
falling on the carpet
an empty bottle
of red wine

A loaf of stale
bread on the counter

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 Posted: Fri May 22nd, 2020 05:26 pm
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timmy
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Nice to see your words here, potabasil, although the words I see are depressing as hell ;)

the sign of a good poem. Write on, girl.

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 Posted: Fri May 22nd, 2020 08:55 pm
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in media res
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The only thing that could be more depressing is if it were an empty bottle of gin.

"Keep on a Carrry On," which is what the British Motto was in WW2

Best,

IMR

P.S. I went to the dictionalry, as the first words that popped in my mind to describe it were Dour and Despair.

DOUR:adjective:

stern, unsmiling, unfriendly, severe, forbidding, gruff, surly, grim, sullen, solemn, austere, stony. ANTONYMS cheerful, friendly.

Another word I would use to describe is Brilliant.

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 Posted: Sat May 23rd, 2020 10:09 am
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Paul Thain
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Actually IMR, it was "Keep Calm and Carry on"

As the Bard once said, "The plague's the thing"

Keep smiling

best

Paul

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 Posted: Sat May 23rd, 2020 10:29 am
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Potabasil
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Dad's Army

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 Posted: Sat May 23rd, 2020 02:30 pm
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One Doc said there may never be a shot for it. Not unusual, he said.
Some viruses just run their course.

They run out of infecting because so many people get it they are now immune,
so they settle in to a nice life of their own.

BUT, he said, they can always COME BACK...like Jack Nicholson in "The Shining."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDpipB4yehk


IMR

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 Posted: Sat May 23rd, 2020 03:27 pm
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Yes, that is what I meant! And me a History major. Shame.

But also, always remember this, from 2 wars! Devastating for many parents
I knew.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8of3uhG1tCI

They were shitty times. As i say in one of my plays, "And they never talked about it." What a group. When the job was done, They just carried on with their lives.

One of my favorite Movies: "The Best Years of our Lives".

https://www.imdb.com/video/vi730792217?ref_=tt_pv_vi_aiv_1

But...now we have a....whatever it is.

A Pan-DAMN-ic.



Best,

IMR

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 Posted: Tue May 26th, 2020 08:42 pm
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Potabasil
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Hi Timmy

Thank you

Potabasil

Last edited on Tue May 26th, 2020 08:42 pm by Potabasil

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 Posted: Tue May 26th, 2020 08:43 pm
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Potabasil
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Hi In Media Res

Thank you

Potabasil

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